Being especially good

I got a vitamin B12 shot today and the place was next to a cafe where a buddy recommended a smoked turkey sandwich, but I didn't give in and resorted to Snyder's 'glowing' plan. I had her Glowing Green smoothie and my black iced coffee (baby steps) for breakfast. For lunch I had a handful of pistachios my mom sent me from a local farmer's market, and this seaweed salad from a Klutch Club box. Right now I'm into subscribing to health food companies who send me samples of health and wellness items. You can find a few companies online like Klutch Club that costs $10-$20 per month, and you can go month-to-month. It definitely helps the craves and reminds me to maintain a healthy lifestyle. The seaweed salad does contain cane sugar powder (baby steps) but there's hot chili peppers in it to give it a kick and me a metabolism and serotonin boost. It's delicious. For dinner I need to get my butt in gear and make Snyder's nut pate and serve it in romaine or butter lettuce leaves I have. I bought the nuts a month ago, and parsley last week especially for it so like Nike...

I also did my kettle bell exercises today. Man it targets your abs too with all of that swinging. The next hot yoga class I'm going to is Saturday morning. I think it's Hip-Hop Abs tomorrow.

Last night I hosted the quiz at the bar. No craves just 1/2 a plate of hot wings and I ate all the veggies without the bleu cheese. I took the skins off of the wings as well. I just love buffalo sauce! Something about heat just 'burns' the craves away. I also made a first-time effort to look sexy, wear makeup, and feel confident. It sure makes a huge difference.

Love,

Smobergirl

Almost two weeks!

Worry Wart

I'm doing a no-no and blogging in bed, but I had to get a few things out, and I took a melatonin.
I was reading a health email about anxiety disorder, and worrying about everything was on the list. Ding ding ding. However so was OCD and panic attacks, both which I don't have, plus a few other qualities I don't carry. However I tend to freak out about just everything, and I'm learning. Food is definitely a factor, like too much, ahem, iced coffee and drinking depressants (the latter you know I'm off of). Then on the other hand I'm totally chill when I drink my green powder, eat my famous guac, or eat some calming pistachios or walnuts. Any nut makes me happy really. However that was today's lesson. I caught myself treating my volunteer and fun jobs with anxiety like I did with my other past jobs which kept me on my toes. The storm's over now and I am grateful to have such a happy life. I am grateful for my family, my silly gato, going to whatever movies I want to see at any time, eating my hippie food without being judged, having a cool roof over my head. Having a backup heater, getting free repair on my dish washer, getting free tire checkups. See all at once it seemed my 'stuff' was falling apart, but it's all being taken care of. I do have a leaky sink which I am leaving a bowl under and I need to call on that, but it's being taken care of for now. No worries.

Another anxiety killer is working out. I'm hitting up the hot yoga 2-3 times a week and DVDs in-between. Today it was kettlebell, tomorrow sweaty yoga and probably more chase-the-kitty-into-his-fort which is a throw blanket over my bicycle propped up against a wall. I love that little stinker.

I splurged on middle-eastern tonight and had muhammara with romaine leaves for dipping. It's a walnut-pepper-pomegranate molasses sauce that is like gold. Then I had schwarma over a salad and hummus. I have plenty left over for tomorrow's lunch. No carbs, natural sugars, lots of protein. Feeling good.

Night,

SG

B-r-r-r-r-r-r-r-r-r!

My heat is getting wonky again (not working) so I thank my lucky stars for my fake fireplace which blows hot air under a lightbulb flame. It has ambience. I thought it was cheesy at first but now I thank my lucky stars that I have a back up. It is a cutie actually.

Fried food=bad. I should know this. The black bean egg rolls and freshly cut steak fries I had for lunch were delicious but heavy and now I need a nap. No excuses! Wine and mint cigarettes are also tasty eh? I know to make better choices. I know it's freezing but I can make eggs, oatmeal, steamed veggies, hot grains, and tea. I'm thinking more and more about what food does to my body. The thought of fried food and carbon going into my temple is now gross, and I threw the rest away. No mas. I also have great substitutes for sugar sweets and I'll keep making those. That would be fruit with honey, smoothies, raw pudding, and raw nut cream. I made an almond frangipane last weekend and it's amazing. All it is is almonds, water, raw honey, and vanilla extract. It's a great sub for whipped cream or a light pudding. Yum!

I just need to tackle the holiday temptations. I have a great recipe for a healthy pumpkin smoothie but I just bought 2 packages of pumpkin spice instant coffee with sugar. Baby steps, and the fried food is outta here at least, so is most breads and cheeses except for goat. Something about eating chewy gobs of rubber grosses me out now. What is that doing to my body? I'm sticking to whole food now more than ever. The egg roll just threw me over the edge I guess.

Love,

SG

Day 11

Good food

Hello. I just made a quinoa pasta and even though I can't move nor zip up my pants (a cup and 1/2 isn't a serving?) I still don't feel guilty. This means no nachos for me at Argo, but I may have to get a frozen hot chocolate later and eat 1/2. I don't usually condone eating junk food but a) What is alcohol and b) during my one-year quit I ate all kinds of crap at times and didn't nearly reach the weight to when I was drinking. Booze is a powerful bloating substance.

Working out works

I did a killer kickboxing DVD today and it relieved so many ailments: tightness, anxiety, anger, worry, low self-esteem, and depression. It was Amy Bento, who kicked my ass royally, something I desperately needed. There were also a few dance elements which I appreciated with my dance background and knowing that's all Madonna does is dance. Well that and yoga, at least she used to do tons of yoga.

I didn't eat this in the dark, the flash was on. I have a great cook in the family who used this recipe from The Pioneer Woman. It's a corn cake lettuce wrap, I don't know the exact name for it and it looked way prettier when she made it. I had left overs today and threw things in the lettuce. It's pretty amazing though. I had a kale, plum, pomegranate, and apple smoothie this morning with a little oatmeal, and a hard-boiled egg for a snack. Need that protein for all of those punches.

On day one I didn't want to barf so I did a gentle yoga routine at home, Rodney Yee's hip opening sequence. Funny entertainment is also therapeutic, and after watching SNL with the fam I went to 7 Psychopaths with a friend the next day, day two. Day three here and the Antabuse is keeping me out of trouble. I got a sexy black outfit in the mail from an LNA coupon and I tell you that is confidence-boosting. Pics coming soon. I picked up a $116 check from the consignment shop and I'll see if there's anything else I don't wear or doesn't make me feel awesome. The goal now is only wear clothes that I feel flattering in. No excuses that you need a significant other to wear sexy anything, under things included!

Recap: Exercise, laughing, feeling sexy. This is my pathway out of smoking and drinking. There will be a day where I'll get off the Antabuse and I need a backup plan. Plus my mood is already skyrocketing at day three. Well I did have two months, before then six months, and before then a year smober also within the last two years, but you get the gist.

Love,

SG

Day three

Doing it right

Junkies love to make excuses. "I can take Antabuse every other day and it will still work." Means, "The day I don't take it I can probably still get away with drinking." So I slipped last night, late, and stil turned red and itchy. Then I ate then kept drinking and the redness went away. I took an Antabuse this morning and will continue to do so every morning. I am ashamed, I ranted on the social network drunk and sent some angry emails. I was pretty hurt but this is not a way to get redemption. I have friends worried about me. I am just glad that they are there.

I am drinking water with Amazing Grass Creamsicle flavor which is pretty tasty. I'm going to power yoga in an hour. Just do it, like Nike says. Working out definitely keeps the craves at bay. I may cough or gag today, but I'm doing it.

Love,

SG

Day four catch-up

Thighs...burning...

I did a kettle bell DVD workout and it's not so much my arms are sore, but my thighs from swinging the damn thing between my legs! Hurts so good. Jillian Michaels' 30 minute Weight Shred. Check it out.

Eating well, having a little iced dessert here and there. Back on the melatonin to help me sleep.

Night,

Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzmobergirl