Hung Over

But you know not really. I didn't know OD-ing on rice and staying up until 2 am made you so groggy. Well yeah, I was up until about 2:00. That could explain it. I feel much better and relieved. It's over. I'm enjoying a Hazelnut Teechino right now. Life isn't too shabby. Guitar lesson at 3:00. Yoga at my leisure on my new Namaste Yoga DVDs. Boyfriend coming over tonight to make an ahi slad and watch The Adventures of Tin-Tin. Life's pretty good.

Smobergirl

Still up.

Feeling better, and not like the horrible flake I really am. j/k. Iced Teechino, rice milk, jade rice. Rice in the Teechino (seriously there's barley in it). My AWESOME boyfriend just called again to make sure I was okay. It's good to stay up late. I smell like bananas. It's my lotion from Lush cosmetics. Now getting tired. Feeling good. It was all for the best and now I don't have to worry about how to give in my 2 weeks. Reputation not ruined. It just wasn't a match. I have other local band events in the works. I'm still loved.

Love,

Smobergirl

Canned.

Well maybe even asking a, b, and c wouldn't have kept me there. I am typing to you in tears even though I had the hardest time for months there and I wanted to leave. In December I told my mom and my new guy that it wasn't for me, and they both wanted me to stick through Sundance. Well that ends this weekend and tonight I got let go. At least I got to network (and here's me redeeming myself: Do a good deed and go to http://www.playtimethemovie.com and donate to their Kickstarter) and got a few freebies. However I was losing interest in the gig and being sad as well as walking on eggshells around the director and I showed it. I wasn't afraid or didn't care to not go up last weekend in the blizzard (which was much, much needed here in UT). I was being lazy and I didn't want to crawl up to PC for an hour and 1/2 to work for two hours and sleep on a couch. So yeah I deserved it, but I should had quit first. I have never been fired in my life, and it sure sucks even though you were miserable there. It seemed that place was for locals and students who wanted to get their foot in the TV door and be willing to work their hineys off for peanuts. I did that in my 20's...and 30's and I refuse to go back there. I'm a prima donna, sorry.  So what's a girl to do. I'm free. I'm out of the small cable media zoo. You know, every time I am low, I think what my anti-gravity yoga teacher says after a hard exercise, "Run it out, it's in the past, run it out, it's over!"

Love,

Smobergirl

Day 620

P.S. Dammit I didn't even drink to get fired! WTF. :-)

Day 4...

...no coffee. Feeling good and sleepy at 10:00 pm. I love my Teechino. The hazelnut is the best so far for my cravings, and with almond milk I make or the rice milk which Costco has right now. I also stocked up on Coco Loco (coconut water), avocados, Roma tomatoes, Anjou pears, and a pineapple there. I made Sarma's Watercress Tang yesterday with the pears and pineapple and it's pretty awesome. I'm eating more and more whole foods and the only processed has been local Crumb Brother's seed bread and the tube pasta in my kale soup, which I still have! It sure makes a ton. I've been living off of that and avos and juice. Oh yeah and I have to dip the bread in the soup. The Real Simple recipe called for it. I obeyed.

I feel calmer. We'll see what happens down the road (almost) caffeine-free. I still drink green tea and oops is that dark chocolate with a little caffeine?

Good night,

Smobergirl

I lived!

And I already felt tired at 8:45 opposed to not until between 11:00 and 1:00. Good girl. I think I can keep this up. I craved (coffee) at 2:00 pm so I made a Teechino with almond milk and that did the trick. You know what? Like wine really, I don't like the taste of coffee. I was addicted. I'd prefer the taste and feeling I have drinking tea more. Teechino has that roasted flavor like coffee, and you brew it like coffee, but it's made of chicory root, barley, figs, carob, nuts and berries and twigs. j/k It's caffiene-free and it's called 'herbal coffee'. It's pretty tasty too. My favorite flavors are chocolate mint, Aztec chocolate, hazelnut, and amaretto. Hmmmm, chocolate and alcohol flavors, go figure. So, I wanted that coffee taste and not tea (because I've been using it for 21 years perhaps), but I really do like tea. It feels lighter. I went all-tea-no-coffee all of last January and it felt great. But I want to keep off it for good.

Smobergirl

Coffee quit day 1...

...attempt number ? I finally got spooked again by a blog from a nutritionist who's book I just picked up. "Caffiene from coffee can lead to mood swings and anxiety." Which I feel I both still possess. So here I am, at Cafe Oasis, with my second-favorite beverage, a green jasmine iced tea. If I freak put for coffee I'll try some straight-up Teechino. I also have an entire shelf stocked with teas, and almond mild and some sparkling beverages in the fridge. I am also working on cutting down on dairy, even though I "had to" get three pints of pumpkin strachiatella from my friend who works at Vinto because it was only available for Thanksgiving and she made a special-ordered batch because, well, it's gelato crack that's why. Other than that I've only put in a parm rind in a fabulous kale soup I made, and had a bit of feta in my Oasis frittata. Yoga and exercise is also keeping the anxiety down. I really have to do it every day! Love, Smobergirl

Guac Tacos!

Yummy! All this is is home made guac and shredded cabbage. I feel so good and well-behaved. Look how pretty they are. Don't forget the lime juice!

~Smobergirl