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Thursday, February 10, 2011

Tears

Is it because I ate meat for the first time in forever twice last week? Is it my crazy guy situations (1 never called back, 1 1 night stand, 1 out of towner who was smitten on day one then sparsely texts or calls, and the latest...1 going through a divorce married for ten years)? Is it because just the past few days the failure feelings are back? I haven't felt the most confident lately, with men and my yoga teachers especially. I hope it's just me, but I feel that the yogis are disappointed in me, however I have been mostly disappointed in their program, so I suppose that is karma. I need to take 20 extra classes at that studio, and I'm going to one in 30 minutes. I like the asanas (the physical practice) it's the Vedic astrology and relationship courses that wanted me to pull my hair out. Yes, astrology. I paid $2700 to learn fung shui, get a psychic reading, learn in order to have a healthy relationship I should be happiness, and if my left nostril is more closed in the morning than my right then I should get out of the right side of the bed. All true. I wished I went to my favorite, and closer to where I live, studio who was bashed for only teaching asana and breathing. Isn't that what teaching mostly is? It's okay, I get my certificate next weekend then I have a 6-week mentorship, which I hope is about actually teaching yoga classes. Me, bitter? That's another thing, maybe I'm not cut out to be a yoga teacher if I'm going to have this attitude.

Smobergirl
Nine months next Thursday.

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