Calming down

Well maybe I should go anyway, but I was watching Dr. Oz at the time of my last post and he was talking about warning signs for different ailments, so I was afraid I may be dying. As you know by now I analyze everything. Now Snyder did say don't jump head first into a detox for you can experience headaches, nausea, fatigue, and the like. My serotonin meds also have a dizziness warning and I just barely switched to full-dose when my doc said I had the choice to do that or stick with 1/2. I pick up a new bottle tomorrow and 1/2 it is.

That fruit smoothie was sure delicious. Next meal is a salad with nut pate wraps. Snore. Yeah something's making me really relaxed.

Love,

SG

Almost a month!

Maybe I should see my doc?

Tired again. I hope I don't have sleep apnea. The slight headaches, irritability, and fatigue could be the detox. But I have moments where I have plenty of energy to exercise. It could be the heavy sweating every other day or so. I am supposed to feel more energy with the vitamin B12 injections, but I feel calmer and I'm losing weight. I am still painting and having a good time. You know, I did take a hot bath this morning and ate a hot lunch. That could make me sleepy. But I did make an awesome smoothie: Pineapple, mango, coconut yogurt, and orange. Mmmmm.

I'll see if I recover by the end of this weekend, if not I'll call the doc.

Love,


SG

I am an artist!

I don't know what I should blame, or just myself, for procrastinating. All I wanted to do for the last month it seems is lay on my couch all day and go to bed at 8. Then today a miracle happened. I played guitar for five minutes, which turned into 30. I also almost completed my painting and started another one. Both of these are extremely meditative and if I had one wish it would be to concentrate on something like these quietly all day. I picked up the guitar right where I left off a month ago, and I keep being reminded how good of a painter I am. I stumbled upon the ebook years ago called Portia The Pig who tries to find her true calling, and she discovers that she is an artist. Petty cool! So even if you don't feel like it, pick up that thing and just say you'll do five minutes. I guarantee you'll go much longer if it is your passion.

SG

Get off yer butt!

Well one out of three ain't bad. I went to hot yoga and finally ran into a friend who works there, and we sweated side by side. Guitar and painting WILL commence tomorrow. I am the broken record but you gotta sweat every day. It's even more important if you are quitting a bad habit. Plus it makes you drink more water! Every quit therapy for smoking I've taken, they say "Drink more water!". When you quit alcohol well, what does alcohol do to you? So you should keep hydrated! And I get 'high' after a hard workout. So there ya go. I think the emergen-c and this recovery drink I got in a Klutch Club box did the trick. I even had boatloads of energy in that 75 minute class. It was only towards the end when I couldn't hold boat pose and I was shaking like a leaf. I wonder why you sweat the most after you stop. When I lay in savasana that's when it all gushes out. I know gross. But I'm getting the bad stuff out.

Less and less. Food that is, and I pay more attention to what I put in my body. With all the nut pate wraps and salad I felt like I ruined it with gelato and damn you whipped cream in a can. I should just toss it. I think instead of sugar I'll let myself have the rest of my pasta in the pantry before I switch to quinoa and rice. I do have this healthy, chunky olive and tomato pasta sauce waiting. Plus now I eat a salad before lunch and dinner. Okay I'm going to pass out now. Oh pain is about 99.9 percent gone. Woot.

SG

Carpe Diem

So My shoulder is about 90% better and it's been a week since I've gone to hot yoga, so I'm going tonight.

Also, it's been more than a week (ashamed to say exactly how long) since I've practiced guitar...

I should finish that painting to go above my bed too.

Disposal being replaced on Friday.

Our first Trader Joe's opens on Friday also. Do I brave it?

I just made Snyder's pine nut parmesan and it's an amazing dressing/dip. Soaking nuts for tonight's nut pate over spinach.

Armed with green powder, Emergen-C, and Bayer.

Love,

SG

I...hurt myself today

OW! I woke up at 4 am and I slept wrong or something, because I felt a sharp pain at the base of my neck. A hot bath and muscle gel didn't make it go away, but it is healing and not nearly as bad as it was. So hot yoga has been postponed to tomorrow.

I am also tired, but Snyder would be proud of me, kinda, today so far minus my presssshus iced coffee and oven-dried stuffing for salad breadcrumbs. I had a GG for breakfast and a huge romaine and parsley salad with avocado, brewers yeast, lime juice, pomegranate seeds, dried stuffing, and roasted pumpkin seeds for lunch. It was very Thanksgiving leftover-tasting goodness. I feel totally satisfied. Three weeks quit and I still feel like I'm getting over a sickness. Now I'm injured. Boo hoo. Well I have my house work, Christmas wrapping, painting, and guitar playing I am physically able to do here at home although I just want a nap.

SG

HOLY GOOD SWEET PATATA!!!

Okay I can die now. Snyder's Basic Yams are anything but. Plus she has two other yam dishes I gotta try now after these. I used garnet yams and they were about 1 1/2 inches thick, so I cut them into rounds.

2 pounds organic yams cut in to 1 1/2 pieces
1 T coconut oil
1/8 t Celtic or Himalayan salt (I used Real Salt made right here in Salt Lake City)

That's it!!!

Pre-heat oven to 375. Lay yams on a baking sheet (I put them on parchment paper). Bake for 1 1/2 hours. Holy goo balls they get caramelly and some even charred that tasted EXACTLY like toasted marshmallows. I know, char=bad evil but I had to have a teensy bit of it. I spread the coconut oil over the tops while still hot and sprinkled on the salt. Apparently these will make you look beautiful! If so I'm having them every stinking night. Snyder recommends these for dinner preceded by the Sunday Salad or the Dharma's Kale Salad. Homework is done.

I was also inspired to use coconut oil as a lip balm and hair frizz-tamer. You know it's an excellent moisturizer. And now I'm smelling goooooood. Coconut oil smells a lot better than cigarette smoke and alcohol seeping through your pores, FYI.

Night,

SG

Day 23

Peace of mind

I didn't have to spend any money today, but I did throw in $10 for gas to have peace of mind. I got $70 from the consignment shop and put $60 in the bank. Good girl.

I had a hot water with lemon and a GGS for breakfast, Vietnamese veggie noodle soup for lunch with um maybe a gelato with whip for a snack, one iced coffee which I wasn't really feeling good physically drinking, a hard-boiled local farm egg, and for dinner I was much healthier eating Snyder's Sunday Salad and her Basic Yam recipe is in the oven that goes with the salad. I lived off of her raw lasagna for a week once and I already started to look and feel better. So 6 outta eight ain't bad eh?

DAIRY. The one thing my friends and family say they can never give up is cheese, which is the last thing Snyder gave up. I will again attempt to go dairy-free, for I felt my best when I went vegan for 40 days and 40 nights about five years ago, even though I'm not religious. No not even goat cheese, just DF cold turkey.

APPRECIATING. This is one of the Mellissa Joy Manning pieces I have. I got it around this time last year on sale, probably Cyber Monday. It is natural stone and I forgot what it is, but I covet it. I don't need more even though I cried I missed out on this year's sale. So what? It's all material. You know what I do appreciate myself the most for is keeping jewelry of sentimental value over anything else. I'm not a huge jewelry wearer, but wearing things with meaning makes me the happiest. Knowing that this is a natural element and the company uses sustainable practices, warms my heart as well. And maybe I have a girl crush on Snow who recommended MJM on her show.

No workout but I'm going to hot yoga tomorrow.

Gotta go, I've got salad, mom on the phone, and DWTS on all at the same time.

Love,

SG

Cyber mayhem

I think my Safari quit for the first time blogging because the internets must be busy due to Cyber Monday. Hmmm maybe. I was chatting about only eating when you are hungry and make sure you eat enough of the good stuff. I deprived myself for dinner at 6:00 eating a little kale salad, the top of an Amy's personal pizza, and the whipped cream on my gelato. By 9 I was ravenous so I had leftover mashers and a water with a splash O' cherry juice.


Topic #2: Did I tell you to appreciate what you have? I think I'm intelligent with finances then I substitute my bad vices with shopping. I admit all of my X-mas shopping is almost done and I had fun supporting local businesses. Then yesterday and today the evil emails poured in for "Pre-Cyber Monday" sales. This year they invented sales before the sales! What will they think of next. So I went a little crazy spending $25 here and $49 there and then the shock set in when I barely scraped by at the grocery store because of it! My eyes opened again when I got an email for 25% off my favorite eco-jewelery site. "Dammit!" I thought, then I remembered oh yeah I have plenty of lovely things from them. It's Melissa Joy Manning out of a California studio. I found them from Sara Snow's TV show and fell in love with their natural stones and recycled metals. I do support them so go shop for me and get a little something nice for the holidays. http://www.melissajoymanning.com. Also check out locals http://thecopperphoenix.com (the prices are insanely reasonable), http://www.tattooedtinker.com, JLB Designs which can be found at Maison boutique, and http://www.kathleencarricaburu.com. I also freaked because today online it's 10-point day on the Nordstrom site, but guess what, I don't need anything! I just felt the pressure to buy but now it's a relief knowing I won't. Those member cards are not healthy in all honesty. So I chilled and thought SG what happened to loving and wanting what you already have? Then you'd be able to afford gas this week. Well new game plan. Don't drive (well I have a little gas) I mean I am truly blessed. I went to the grocer's just in time to stock up on clean eating this week. I got goods for a tropical smoothie, micro-greens and herbage and romaine for salads and wraps, one avo, coconut yogurt, I still have nuts for paté, I have forbidden rice, shit loads of tea and coffee, lentils, garnet yams, garlic, cilantro, frozen acai packets, Emergen-C, Shakeology, seaweed snacks, snack bars, granola bites, almond milk...I think this is a great blessing in disguise. Now I can't go out and eat bad food. But I do have some ice cream, sugary iced-coffee instant evilness, and whip left. What's a girl to do? Hey, I ain't drinkin' and I ain't smokin'. Baby. Steps. Okay now I will read more recipes in Snyder's book.

I am also blessed to have two more weeks of Groupon hot yoga and DAY-YANG I have a Living Sosh deal for a vegan cafe. I'm loaded. I don't needs no moneys. Then I'll be in the green again literally on Thursday.

Love love love,

SG

One week and one day

Learning to love good food, or listen to reality.

I've been on this whipped cream and Vinto gelato kick all week, thinking 'well it's not cigs nor alcohol', along with eating chewy home made breads and artisan cheese. Then I had some blackberries today. I was thirsty for them! They were the best blackberries I've ever had even though they were the few five left over from two weeks ago. I scarfed up a kale salad. I felt so refreshed and rewarded making an apple, mint, spinach, cucumber, and celery smoothie this morning. Then I yo-yoed tonight and had trouble eating the bread and cheese from an Amy's pizza (though it tasted so delicious) and local honey orange gelato with a pile of whipped cream from the can. I think, it tastes good but I don't want this coursing through my body. Even as I kid I once thought how do I taste this and not digest it? Thank God I never became bulimic nor anorexic.

I now am back in the yoga routine. I have my mat at the foot of the bed and I roll onto it every morning.  I got in front of the mirror today and did bird on a wire on one leg! Must be Jillian's squats or the hot yoga. Or bounding up the stairs.

So I dyed my hair black cherry and I think it's gorgeous. I really thought I wanted the dark chestnut or ombre celebrity look, but even sometimes celebs have hair faux pas. I thought I wanted a look so men would like me, but I am loving this dark purpleness. I see it on others and thought it looked cool but not for me, but it did something to my confidence. It looks amazing on short hair. I feel smoldering and sharp. It feels pretty awesome. Even my dad raved, and he's the hard to please one.

Along with the sweets, I have another plan to eliminate coffee. I have a cupboard-full of instant coffees, and it will probably last until 2013. So after I am done with that I also have a boat load of teas, and for black Friday I even got more 'beauty tea'. Oy black Friday. Killed me, but it was fun while it lasted. Holiday marketing keeps getting earlier. Not only do decorations pop up in the stores now on November 1, but this is the first year I've heard of "Pre-Black Friday" sales on Wednesday. What? I already have my "Early Cyber Monday" shopping done. Tomorrow just won't be as exciting. Well I'm out of dough for now so no biggie. I'm glad I have a new girlfriend to shop with but bit it's hard not to shop for yourself when you two go out! I got a hot oxblood number and my abs actually looked flat in it. She oohed and ahhed and it did make my boobs look amazing and it was 15% off if I donated a coat to charity so you know I just had to do it. This quit is all about self-esteem and thanks to hot yoga I looked pretty amazing, and my lower abs are zipping up. Aaaand the crazy purple-black hair looks incredible with oxblood.

The Antibuse is still keeping everything in check and quite frankly, I learned after my last relapse which really felt awful and not pleasurable, it's just not worth it. I'd rather feel good, and I saw Dr. Mehmet Oz say last week, if you change the universe inside your body it will change your outside universe.

Love,

SG

Three weeks

More energy.

Shot #2 of B12 today and I feel much better. I also ate hot chowder and evil clogging sourdough and I didn't get tired. However, it's GG and salad before dinner tomorrow. ;)

I have almost all of my Christmas shopping done, and I saved enough to get some crazy things for myself at H&M. There's this far-out Belgian designer I discovered through them and his French house line is Maison Martin Margiella. I can't believe three weeks smober will be in three days. I'm back at the country station helping with holiday vacation fill-in work. I can't tell you how good my life is. The hot yoga is toning me up. The staff at the station are the friendliest radio staff I have ever experienced and they are just as efficient, professional, and creative. Good for the soul. I do what I enjoy and enjoy the peeps I work with. The quiz night is a kick. It's something I love having control over and that's good for the esteem. The people who play are usually young career-minded folk or college students, all amazingly cool. I'm pretty lucky and thankful right now, part of that is due to cleaning myself up (never mind the quart of clam chowder and sourdough bread, and mini pomegranate merengue pie, and pumpkin stracciatella gelato). Hey I'm sweating it all out three times a week. ;) To make up for that I made a green smoothie with guava! in it. Harmons has them. Fresh guava in Utah! Well they are green and very small and definitely imported but it's guava and my smoothie was amazing. I'm also into Snyder's strategy of softening torn kale leaves in sea salt then adding brewer's yeast and lemon juice for a salad.

I darkened my hair black cherry and I got fake biscuit earrings from Chou Chou Bijoux on the website Bottica. I feel super hip and cool now, with the new addition of my MMM garb. I may be making up for my 'appreciate what I have' month. It is fun though and I love the holiays. I think my tinsel tree is going to take about 1000 lights though. Thank God I have the patience of a rock. Plus it's meditative, really. I watch movies. I like my time alone. I get soup from the Vietnamese place sometimes. I chase the cat in skivvies, I walk or run him up and down the hall clothed, okay sometimes in PJs.


I am thankful for all that I am and all that I have. Life is good and I am also pretty darned proud of myself. I even just had one small iced coffee today and a ton of water. What's up with that?

Love,

SG
Day18

No energy

I wished I hads an explanation. There's actually several plausible ones. I've been sweating like a pig at the hot yoga, I'm detoxing again, then I cave into sugar sometimes, and I stay up late and wake up early. Yeah that makes sense. But, I had that viamin B12 shot. Oh well. I get another one next week.

I made Snyder's glowing green smoothie with a knob of ginger and I actually like it better. It's pretty delish. Guess what??? I made a nut paté. Yay. It's amazing.

http://kimberlysnyder.net/blog/2012/01/17/macadamia-nut-and-sundried-tomato-mash-recipe/

Okay well I'll rest for a bit and plow through this 'quit flu'.

Love,

SG

Two weeks!

Pretty good moderation day

Well I had a good mood day. But...I didn't make the nut paté. Snyder recommends it for dinner and I always think about it...not during dinner time. Okay I'll make it when I think about it! It sounds delicious too. Macadamia nuts, sun-dried tomatoes. Yum!

Sexy at home: I broke out my favorite white RVCA sweater and wore it with a purple silk bra and maroon cords. Even feeling hot at home boosts my mood. Feeling toned after kettle bell throwing, even better! Also I thought I mastered the art of safe tanning, I used a gradual-tan lotion every day so there's no streaking and it looks natural. It's another way for me to feel beautiful. However, I just found out that one contains parabens and both have DHA. Well I have an awesome immune system and normal blood pressure and cholesterol, so is it up the ante on the green drinks and back to the drawing board? My DNA hasn't felt warped...yet. :) Well I'll do some more research. If you google natural organic self-tanners a few pop up, and I may try one or two of those and give you a report. Bugger! The others I really liked. Hey I still feel sexy. You know what is really sexy? Eat pineapple every day for a week and you'll smell delicious! Seriously. Great for date planning, even if you're pasty white. ;)

Anywho I had some of my copious stash of romaine leaves with muhammara and a little bit of the schwarma. I thought I may feel deprived eating like a rabbit all day and what ended it perfectly was two nut-free chocolate chip cookies and a glass of almond milk. It was the best cookies and milk I've ever had. I don't have a pit in my stomach neither. So I'm done. I ate before 8. Heck it's not even 7. I'll need a relaxing yoga exercise then I can go to bed. I still like to putz around online though. Baby steps. Will you just remind me to make that stinking paté tomorrow?

Love,

SG

Being especially good

I got a vitamin B12 shot today and the place was next to a cafe where a buddy recommended a smoked turkey sandwich, but I didn't give in and resorted to Snyder's 'glowing' plan. I had her Glowing Green smoothie and my black iced coffee (baby steps) for breakfast. For lunch I had a handful of pistachios my mom sent me from a local farmer's market, and this seaweed salad from a Klutch Club box. Right now I'm into subscribing to health food companies who send me samples of health and wellness items. You can find a few companies online like Klutch Club that costs $10-$20 per month, and you can go month-to-month. It definitely helps the craves and reminds me to maintain a healthy lifestyle. The seaweed salad does contain cane sugar powder (baby steps) but there's hot chili peppers in it to give it a kick and me a metabolism and serotonin boost. It's delicious. For dinner I need to get my butt in gear and make Snyder's nut pate and serve it in romaine or butter lettuce leaves I have. I bought the nuts a month ago, and parsley last week especially for it so like Nike...

I also did my kettle bell exercises today. Man it targets your abs too with all of that swinging. The next hot yoga class I'm going to is Saturday morning. I think it's Hip-Hop Abs tomorrow.

Last night I hosted the quiz at the bar. No craves just 1/2 a plate of hot wings and I ate all the veggies without the bleu cheese. I took the skins off of the wings as well. I just love buffalo sauce! Something about heat just 'burns' the craves away. I also made a first-time effort to look sexy, wear makeup, and feel confident. It sure makes a huge difference.

Love,

Smobergirl

Almost two weeks!

Worry Wart

I'm doing a no-no and blogging in bed, but I had to get a few things out, and I took a melatonin.
I was reading a health email about anxiety disorder, and worrying about everything was on the list. Ding ding ding. However so was OCD and panic attacks, both which I don't have, plus a few other qualities I don't carry. However I tend to freak out about just everything, and I'm learning. Food is definitely a factor, like too much, ahem, iced coffee and drinking depressants (the latter you know I'm off of). Then on the other hand I'm totally chill when I drink my green powder, eat my famous guac, or eat some calming pistachios or walnuts. Any nut makes me happy really. However that was today's lesson. I caught myself treating my volunteer and fun jobs with anxiety like I did with my other past jobs which kept me on my toes. The storm's over now and I am grateful to have such a happy life. I am grateful for my family, my silly gato, going to whatever movies I want to see at any time, eating my hippie food without being judged, having a cool roof over my head. Having a backup heater, getting free repair on my dish washer, getting free tire checkups. See all at once it seemed my 'stuff' was falling apart, but it's all being taken care of. I do have a leaky sink which I am leaving a bowl under and I need to call on that, but it's being taken care of for now. No worries.

Another anxiety killer is working out. I'm hitting up the hot yoga 2-3 times a week and DVDs in-between. Today it was kettlebell, tomorrow sweaty yoga and probably more chase-the-kitty-into-his-fort which is a throw blanket over my bicycle propped up against a wall. I love that little stinker.

I splurged on middle-eastern tonight and had muhammara with romaine leaves for dipping. It's a walnut-pepper-pomegranate molasses sauce that is like gold. Then I had schwarma over a salad and hummus. I have plenty left over for tomorrow's lunch. No carbs, natural sugars, lots of protein. Feeling good.

Night,

SG

B-r-r-r-r-r-r-r-r-r!

My heat is getting wonky again (not working) so I thank my lucky stars for my fake fireplace which blows hot air under a lightbulb flame. It has ambience. I thought it was cheesy at first but now I thank my lucky stars that I have a back up. It is a cutie actually.

Fried food=bad. I should know this. The black bean egg rolls and freshly cut steak fries I had for lunch were delicious but heavy and now I need a nap. No excuses! Wine and mint cigarettes are also tasty eh? I know to make better choices. I know it's freezing but I can make eggs, oatmeal, steamed veggies, hot grains, and tea. I'm thinking more and more about what food does to my body. The thought of fried food and carbon going into my temple is now gross, and I threw the rest away. No mas. I also have great substitutes for sugar sweets and I'll keep making those. That would be fruit with honey, smoothies, raw pudding, and raw nut cream. I made an almond frangipane last weekend and it's amazing. All it is is almonds, water, raw honey, and vanilla extract. It's a great sub for whipped cream or a light pudding. Yum!

I just need to tackle the holiday temptations. I have a great recipe for a healthy pumpkin smoothie but I just bought 2 packages of pumpkin spice instant coffee with sugar. Baby steps, and the fried food is outta here at least, so is most breads and cheeses except for goat. Something about eating chewy gobs of rubber grosses me out now. What is that doing to my body? I'm sticking to whole food now more than ever. The egg roll just threw me over the edge I guess.

Love,

SG

Day 11

Good food

Hello. I just made a quinoa pasta and even though I can't move nor zip up my pants (a cup and 1/2 isn't a serving?) I still don't feel guilty. This means no nachos for me at Argo, but I may have to get a frozen hot chocolate later and eat 1/2. I don't usually condone eating junk food but a) What is alcohol and b) during my one-year quit I ate all kinds of crap at times and didn't nearly reach the weight to when I was drinking. Booze is a powerful bloating substance.

Working out works

I did a killer kickboxing DVD today and it relieved so many ailments: tightness, anxiety, anger, worry, low self-esteem, and depression. It was Amy Bento, who kicked my ass royally, something I desperately needed. There were also a few dance elements which I appreciated with my dance background and knowing that's all Madonna does is dance. Well that and yoga, at least she used to do tons of yoga.

I didn't eat this in the dark, the flash was on. I have a great cook in the family who used this recipe from The Pioneer Woman. It's a corn cake lettuce wrap, I don't know the exact name for it and it looked way prettier when she made it. I had left overs today and threw things in the lettuce. It's pretty amazing though. I had a kale, plum, pomegranate, and apple smoothie this morning with a little oatmeal, and a hard-boiled egg for a snack. Need that protein for all of those punches.

On day one I didn't want to barf so I did a gentle yoga routine at home, Rodney Yee's hip opening sequence. Funny entertainment is also therapeutic, and after watching SNL with the fam I went to 7 Psychopaths with a friend the next day, day two. Day three here and the Antabuse is keeping me out of trouble. I got a sexy black outfit in the mail from an LNA coupon and I tell you that is confidence-boosting. Pics coming soon. I picked up a $116 check from the consignment shop and I'll see if there's anything else I don't wear or doesn't make me feel awesome. The goal now is only wear clothes that I feel flattering in. No excuses that you need a significant other to wear sexy anything, under things included!

Recap: Exercise, laughing, feeling sexy. This is my pathway out of smoking and drinking. There will be a day where I'll get off the Antabuse and I need a backup plan. Plus my mood is already skyrocketing at day three. Well I did have two months, before then six months, and before then a year smober also within the last two years, but you get the gist.

Love,

SG

Day three

Doing it right

Junkies love to make excuses. "I can take Antabuse every other day and it will still work." Means, "The day I don't take it I can probably still get away with drinking." So I slipped last night, late, and stil turned red and itchy. Then I ate then kept drinking and the redness went away. I took an Antabuse this morning and will continue to do so every morning. I am ashamed, I ranted on the social network drunk and sent some angry emails. I was pretty hurt but this is not a way to get redemption. I have friends worried about me. I am just glad that they are there.

I am drinking water with Amazing Grass Creamsicle flavor which is pretty tasty. I'm going to power yoga in an hour. Just do it, like Nike says. Working out definitely keeps the craves at bay. I may cough or gag today, but I'm doing it.

Love,

SG

Day four catch-up

Thighs...burning...

I did a kettle bell DVD workout and it's not so much my arms are sore, but my thighs from swinging the damn thing between my legs! Hurts so good. Jillian Michaels' 30 minute Weight Shred. Check it out.

Eating well, having a little iced dessert here and there. Back on the melatonin to help me sleep.

Night,

Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzmobergirl