Woot woot! Getting better, feeling better, looking better through Bikram even though it is absolute torture and I may take a break. I'm actually about to do Hip Hop Abs right now, then take a hot bath and teach my private student yoga. They all keep my spirits up.
I was emotionally eating too much gnocci with gorgonzola cheese, but I'm practicing the good with the bad for a short while, 1-4 weeks, until I'm ready to get back on the health wagon. Baby steps again. After HHA I'll make an acai, chia, and banana smoothie with Amazing Greens powder. Then I'm watching my friends play at a Japanese restaurant tonight so that means sushi! No sake, just sushi and maybe an iced green tea.
If it took me ten years to realize that I don't want to go through depressant emotional pain anymore so be it. I have wanted to quit my vices for so long. We are habitual beings and that's a habit I couldn't let go of even though I suffered through many heartbreaks. It could had been worse, but stopping sooner would had been better or continuing my 8-month quit. Stuff will probably come out today. I want to be a good example for you and myself. Those eight months quit made me feel on top of the world. It's absolutely true, you can't go back and still feel those feelings. Life is truly so much better without cigs and alcohol. I stumbled upon the movie "Rachel Getting Married" last night on the TV, and even though a character was a hard drug addict as well as an alcoholic, it sure hit home. I don't have the family problems she did in the movie, but I could absolutely relate and it is hard to have people not understand what you are going through most of the time. However I have a ton of friends who do understand, so I am pretty lucky. Earlier I said I felt broken and my career would be over, but it's not and I'm not. During my last long quit, life turned around 180, and I want to be hopeful that it will happen again. It will get even better quitting for good. Thanks for reading. Off to hip hop!
One week behind, time flies if you let it.
Love,
Smobergirl
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