I'm doing a no-no and blogging in bed, but I had to get a few things out, and I took a melatonin.
I was reading a health email about anxiety disorder, and worrying about everything was on the list. Ding ding ding. However so was OCD and panic attacks, both which I don't have, plus a few other qualities I don't carry. However I tend to freak out about just everything, and I'm learning. Food is definitely a factor, like too much, ahem, iced coffee and drinking depressants (the latter you know I'm off of). Then on the other hand I'm totally chill when I drink my green powder, eat my famous guac, or eat some calming pistachios or walnuts. Any nut makes me happy really. However that was today's lesson. I caught myself treating my volunteer and fun jobs with anxiety like I did with my other past jobs which kept me on my toes. The storm's over now and I am grateful to have such a happy life. I am grateful for my family, my silly gato, going to whatever movies I want to see at any time, eating my hippie food without being judged, having a cool roof over my head. Having a backup heater, getting free repair on my dish washer, getting free tire checkups. See all at once it seemed my 'stuff' was falling apart, but it's all being taken care of. I do have a leaky sink which I am leaving a bowl under and I need to call on that, but it's being taken care of for now. No worries.
Another anxiety killer is working out. I'm hitting up the hot yoga 2-3 times a week and DVDs in-between. Today it was kettlebell, tomorrow sweaty yoga and probably more chase-the-kitty-into-his-fort which is a throw blanket over my bicycle propped up against a wall. I love that little stinker.
I splurged on middle-eastern tonight and had muhammara with romaine leaves for dipping. It's a walnut-pepper-pomegranate molasses sauce that is like gold. Then I had schwarma over a salad and hummus. I have plenty left over for tomorrow's lunch. No carbs, natural sugars, lots of protein. Feeling good.
Night,
SG
walnut-pepper-pomegranate molasses... that sounds amazing. So I'm "smober" now for 4 months! woohoo! This is so HARD. Fingers crossed it gets easier.
ReplyDeleteWoo hoo! Congrats Nichole! It's sure tough, but do ANYTHING but smoke and drink. It gets easier to live a healthy lifestyle down the road, but now take care of yourself as much as you can and give into chocolate, burgers, movies, milkshakes, sleeping in, shopping, three baths a day....because those are MUCH healthier than the alternative for now. During my first year quit I gained 5 pounds in a month, then after three more months whoosh! The pounds started dropping after my metabolism kicked back in to gear. Be patient, love yourself, you can do it!
ReplyDeleteThanks honey... oh my gosh it's hard when the cravings hit. I'm finding the holidays coming up to be a bit daunting. I will take your advice and just hang in there as best I can. You are right it is so worth it. I miss the smokes but I don't miss the smell or how I feel after a bottle of wine and a pack the night before... LOL!!!
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