At least I don't feel guilty, I just feel a sour stomach. I could have said, "too much wine and smoking" right? Or, "too many fries and double cheeseburgers". I spent all day at home painting up a storm, washing the balcony after three years of neglect, ew gross, jumping on the Bosu, playing with the cats, and doing a relaxing but core-building (that means abs) kundalini workout. I didn't even check the mail.
First I woke up at noon. I was stressing a little yesterday about some stuff and maybe my body needed the rest. I did feel refreshed at noon. I had my shake.
1/4 cup raspberries
1/4 cup spa water (limes, mint infused. Mint from my planter! Thanks to my brother who gave me herb garden seeds for Christmas last year. They actually grew and I have chamomile, mint, lavender, and um some other things I forgot what's in there.)
1 tsp cocoa/maca
1 tsp chia seeds
1 tsp flax
1 tsp hemp
3 small kale leaves
1 bok choy
2 tiny ginger knobs
My mother sends me stuff from the Las Vegas Trader Joe's sometimes when she goes. She lives in St. George so she goes there quite often. She gave me a lentil soup mix from Red Mill that is delish. I added scallions, garlic, the acorn squash that had been sitting in my fridge for a month, and tomato. Then an hour ago I got into the Trader Joe's tamari almonds and went a little crazy. Now I am thanking my lucky stars I live alone, I'm not lonely tonight! because apparently tamari almonds cause serious flatulence.
Speaking of me mum, I kinda got the guilt talk about how I shouldn't be such a bum. Maybe that's why I got so guilty and worked up. I kinda signed up for yoga teacher training (yep doing it. It starts on the 29th) because I have to and she said I had to do something. Don't get me wrong, I am stoked, just nervous that's all. I can't sit around anymore whining about my radio and drinking mishaps. A year and 1/2 is enough. Then she asked me if yoga teaching pays the bills and I'm biting my nails thinking well dear God I hope so. I am assuming this: It will at least improve my lifestyle. And B: Perhaps brain wash me into a hippy, but I'd be happy, right? Then I'd scare off all my friends by telling them that they need to open their chakras or that they have negative auras. I'm just kidding. lol.
My mom is a successful artist, and she likes to tell me how she paints seven hours a day so I should get off my tush and do something. Well then I thought that's easy. I'LL paint seven hours a day! I think I did 'only' about 5 today but I got so much done, and I am going to impress the pants off of her. Or try. I'm almost done with a pretty cherry blossom painting, and my mom has never heard of Day Of The Dead dolls, so I painted some gourds white tonight, and I'm going to show her what that's all about. She's a gourd artist, and in 5 art galleries in Utah. She just sold three to a man in Singapore for $3000. What what? She is very talented. I neglected a horse bowl we took a class on two years ago and I spent about two hours on that today. She told me that I 'out burn' her so that's a huge compliment and it felt great to almost finish it. Instead of carving gourds, you burn patterns in them with a burning tool. Art for me is a lot like meditation. I liked doing mosaics so much, it was like putting a puzzle together. I've taken watercolor and oil painting classes in college. Then I discovered mosaics. Then I got so wrapped up in trying to make a lot of money as a DJ or voiceover artist which never happened, turned into an alcoholic, then lost interest in a lot of things including doing art and cleaning my stupid balcony. Plus I got the typical lectures back in the day from other family members and old boyfriends about how art is great but it doesn't pay the bills. Thank God I listened to them. Bastards. No, not bitter at all. :)
I am now starting to feel like my life is coming back together. Good day, good day.
Smobergirl
Day 144
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