Anxieties begone!

Okay so I had this huge paranoia this morning, and I'm okay now. In the article, which I am still thrilled it happened, I mentioned I became a 'closet wino' after my second DUI (the DUI happened in 2005). I was actually hesitant to include that and the mean text/email/FB thing. After the sentence, I was on 'not a drop' for two years, which I was on my best behavior for the record. I became unhappy with work and excruciatingly lonely in 2008 and that's when the vengeful texting and emails started. So that was my big paranoia that the cops would knock on my door because I said that in the article. I never broke any rules. I wanted to include my bad behaviors to show people that I turned my life around, and so can anybody. I want to be a role model and In This Week gave me the opportunity to share my story. Hey I feel better already.

Speaking of my closet wino days, I also would have the opposite behavior and flirt. Done this one? That got me into trouble too and I think I may have lost a friend over it. I managed to embarrass myself more than once. But the past needs to be in the past and I can't let those actions haunt me anymore. Dangit now I'm gonna cry. The truth will set you free but how far should you go? The article is out now and I am more proud than ashamed. If it didn't say those things then maybe I wouldn't be as much as an influence. Sadly I know at least three other women, and one man, who occasionally drink 1-2 bottles of wine alone at home due to loneliness and sadness. And sadly some people don't believe it is a problem. Some people told me that I didn't have a problem. Is there some kind of activity we can create to avoid this behavior? Because, I think it's not a keen idea. Maybe it's called AA. But if one does not want to be in that club I don't see why other groups can't be created to go to coffee, movies, bowling, The Pie, etc.

Workout:
30 minutes incline fast walk/run on the treadmill.
Chest, biceps with Gilad (ha ha), rotator cuffs, kettle bell arm swings
Abs, abs, abs. (100's, scissors, bicycles, plank, lying down straight-leg sit ups with a medicine ball....with Gilad my TV boyfriend)
Cow face pose, wide angle seated forward bend, baddha konasana, happy dead baby bug (happy baby or dead bug pose), arm stretches.

That made most of the anxiety melt. Then I made rice medley with grapeseed oil, basil, lemon (which also went on my face and shoulders to fade sun spots), cracked sea salt and pepper, and red pepper flake. I made the watermelon salad, but I was out of watermelon so I substituted mango. I sprinkled my chia, flax, and hemp seeds on the salad.

I keep learning about myself, and I still make mountains out of molehills sometimes. Sure this article was a big risk, but like I said I'm glad I did it because if smokers, the overweight, the lazy, and alkies read it and they are influenced, then I did my job. Thank you again In This Week.


Smobergirl

Day 376