9 out of 90!

Jeeeeeeebus!!!! Tonight was a killer. Out of nowhere, I wanted to drink and smoke so badly. Then I ate, then they came back (they, meaning the $%@#! in my head) then I had a potato, then they came back, then I turned on Rodney and everything got better. Really. I just surrendered and relaxed all of the sudden. Silly brain. I did the forward bend segment, which is good for relaxation and looking 'inward' even though I didn't like what was in me at the moment.

My shirts and jeans are fitting better, but I look tired and haggard lately. I hope and assume that is temporary. My chin still bothers me more than usual. Maybe it's the withdrawals. I know I'm not gaining weight elsewhere. I just need to CHILL. I also coughed a lot this morning and tonight, but I don't know if it's the quit or the crappy inversion.

I am going to read then crash. Things will get better. Please let them get better.

~Smobergirl

Day 10